Hair Raising.

Nov 21st.  Well I think it's starting.  While I was sitting at the table working a puzzle today my hair started coming out.  It's a subtle thing, I'm not sure what I had expected.  I didn't wake up and find myself bald with all my hair on my pillow.  I didn't wash my hair and find it all in the drain.  I actually just ran my hands thru my hair and came out with a hand full.  I've been told this was coming but I won't say it wasn't a shock.  I'm not sure it wasn't as big of a shock as finding out I have cancer.  I'm mad at myself for even caring.  It's just hair right?  That's what I keep telling myself but I sure didn't keep that in mind when I saw it in my hand.  Of course, l was by myself so I didn't have anyone to laugh about it with.  Dan is almost always with me but being the sweet soul he is, he had gone to put gas in my car and to buy me coffee.  Boy when he walked in the door though.  He probably thought someone had died.  Now just so your getting the true picture, I'm NOT bald yet.  I don't even look like I'm losing any hair.  I have a bunch to loose before anyone could ever tell. I'm not sure what happened to me at that moment where I found the hair in my hand.  Maybe it was just all of my emotions about cancer coming out???  I will tell you that this won't happen much.  I know you're suppose to allow yourself to cry but I can't allow myself to be bogged down in self pity.  I have not been given a death sentence I've been given a barrier to climb over....and I will climb it.